Echoes of a Nomad

BotM

Wed, 08 Apr 2009 02:03:52 GMT

My sincerest apologies for the belatitude of this entry. I know I promised it by the weekend, but life got in the way. After spending much time studying, and then half a day doing yard work, I was pretty much side-lined by the mother of all sinus infections . . . complete with bloody nose. But, better late than never!

Due to time constraints, I really haven't had a lot of time to scour the TV shows and movies and other such usual sources for the BotM. However, I am a big enough Terry Pratchett fan that I did not miss the airing of his Colour of Magic TV adaptation. Admittedly, it was not of the caliber I had hoped for. But enjoyable, nonetheless. And while there were a couple lovelies in the film, they did not quite make the cut for one reason or another. But the movie did remind me of a previous film based on one of Pratchett's works. Namely, the Hogfather, which happens to be one of the greatest Christmas movies ever made. Well, not really Christmas . . . Hogswatch. But close enough. In truth, this is the work that introduced me to Pratchett, and got me hooked on his books.

Starring in this wonderfully entertaining movie adaptation is the incredibly lovely and talented Michelle Dockery. And, well, let's face it . . . despite the awkward hairdo, who wouldn't fall in love with a woman of her looks & British accent when playing Death's granddaughter? So, bask once again in the beauterificness of a worthy Babe of the Month. You're welcome.

Foolishness

Thu, 02 Apr 2009 05:59:14 GMT

One of my co-workers (Emily) had the misfortune of being born today. Well, not literally today. But today was the anniversary of her birth. And, well, having April Fool's Day as your birthday with me around (not to mention several other co-workers) kinda makes me feel sorry for her. We had many, many birthday celebrations for her throughout the day. I'm sure she enjoyed it, though.

I haven't forgotten about Babe of the Month. Meant to do it yesterday, but ended up spending the day with my family dealing with left-over sister-stuff like picking out a grave marker and looking at the autopsy report and such. Anyway, between work & school, I probably won't have time to get to it until the weekend. So it'll be a bit late this month, but definitely will get done. I promise. And you can believe that promise, despite the Fool of April.

I hate my job

Thu, 26 Mar 2009 17:17:08 GMT

Yeah, I know . . . not really news there, is it? As time goes on, I loathe working here more and more. Two of the three supervisors in the department are completely worthless, incompetent twits. The third will likely get burned out because she's doing all the work. Our division chief isn't much better (if at all). It has been made fairly clear that I will not be allowed to promote or transfer. And while there are some really great people who work here, there are also some absolutely unbearable, childish assholes. Seriously, if I could afford to do so, I'd walk out the door right now. And I have to fight myself every morning just to get out of bed. I don't just want a new job . . . I need a new job. It is taking a physical toll, not to mention interfering with my education. For a while, things were bearable . . . combination of a new assignment together with my adoption of an "I don't care" attitude. Unfortunately, now that I've got the new assignement under control (part of the project was cleaning up the absolute mess my predecessor left) and the fact that it is not in my nature to not care, I find myself back in the situation of feeling beat down, frustrated, angry, and in utter disbelief at the incompetence here.

If anyone would be kind enough to send me enough money to pay my bills and school costs for the next 3.5 years, I'd be eternally gratefull. A mere $200,000 should cover it.

Friendship

Sat, 14 Mar 2009 23:19:55 GMT

As some of you may know, not long ago I mentioned an "issue" with friends. Not friends in general, but a specific situation. I did not go into details for many reasons, and those reasons still apply. But as things played out I watched a friend cause tremendous pain to another friend, which of course resulted in the destruction of a friendship. Since then, one of my own friendships has been torn apart, and I have watched as others suffer stress, pain, and heartache. Only twice in my life have I ever given up on a friendship. Sure, there have been many times where friends drift apart, but those are not lost friends, just misplaced ones. While giving up on someone is understandably difficult and painful, as time goes on and more happens, I am further convinced that it was the right choice. But problems continue, and watching other friends--dear friends--suffer and become victimized has caused me to think hard about the general concept of friendship. It is apparent that we all have different views on what that word means. To some, friends are merely people who validate their actions/choices, and who worship the ground they walk on. At the other end of the spectrum are those who classify everyone as a friend. My view is somewhere in the middle (as most people's is), and somewhat complex. As such, I will not even attempt to explain it here. But as I gave it thought, certain quotes/lyrics/scenes came to mind. Many of them were not specifically about friendship, but still demonstrate something about how I view it.

Captain, why did you come back for us?
You're on my crew.
Yeah, but you don't even like me. Why'd you come back?
You're on my crew. Why we still talking about this?

Through the years and miles between us
It's been a long and lonely ride
But if I got a call in the dead of the night
I'd be right by your side

I never said "Thank you."
And you'll never have to.

When you can't run, you crawl. And when you can't crawl, you find someone to carry you.

If you should die before me, ask if you could bring a friend.

I'll lean on you and you lean on me and we'll be okay.

Why you doin' this, Doc?
Because Wyatt Earp is my friend.
Friend? Hell, I got lots of friends.
I don't.

I'm not really sure what my point is here, though many of my blog entries really don't have much of a point. Maybe I just need to put some of this down; maybe it's in the hopes that some of these thoughts will make their way back to the people involved, however slight that chance is; perhaps it'll get some of you to think about what friendship means to you, resulting in all of us appreciating our friends more. I don't know. But I felt like saying something, and this seemed as good a topic as any.

Random tidbits

Sun, 08 Mar 2009 00:13:20 GMT

I've been trying to avoid the fast food for a little while now. Unfortunately, today I succumbed to a burger & fries because of time constraints. I still find it completely amazing that people at these places can not do simple math. Handing over a $10 to pay for my $6.45 meal, the cashier accidentally hit the "exact change" button (or whatever). He tried using his fingers to calculate the change. Then called a co-worker over to help him figure it out, who had just as much trouble as he did. Not wanting to wait all day for my change, I gave them the answer ($3.55), which they showed skepticism at. Eventually, they decided to cancel the transaction and try again. Honestly, if I hadn't been so hungry at that point, I would have told them rather than trying again to just give me my $10 back and I'd go somewhere else.
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I've been slacking off a lot lately when it comes to school. And it's really not good. Sadly, it is primarily due to my job & situations surrounding my job. Since I go to school at night, the main study time I have is on the weekends. But when the weekend comes, it usually takes me until late Saturday (at the earliest) to unwind, relax, and build up the mental capacity to focus on the readings. This is irritating me quite a bit, which of course is causing the problem to snowball. Hopefully I get it together before it's too late for finals.
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Speaking of work, there is entirely too much drama there lately. People have frequently complained about the "high school" behavior and attitude. Honestly, I think that's being generous at this point. There is so much backstabbing, petty infighting, nit-picking, hanging in cliques, gossip, and otherwise childish behavior that I think high school would be a step up.
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In the last few months I've gotten back in the habit of doing light workouts. Since I don't have the time to go to an actual gym, I just do some light weights, push-ups, etc. at home. At least it's something. But I think I screwed my shoulder up somehow. Plus, I need to start incorporating cardio.
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While cleaning up around the house today I stumbled across some pictures of me & K. This has caused mixed feelings. Honestly, I thought I had gotten rid of them all, and part of me was kinda glad to find them. That was a happy time in my life that I think would be good to remember. But the flip side is that it also reminds me of how crappy my current life is, and how I miss her.
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Duncan is doing pretty well. Since I'm pretty much gone from 7:30am until 10:00pm on most weekdays, he spends the week over at my parents' house, and comes back with me on the weekends. He gets plenty of company and attention over there, what with my folks home most of the day and their 3 other dogs. Yeah, they went from a 1 dog household to 4 dogs . . . one more consequence of my sister's passing. Dunc tries to keep up with the other dogs as best he can (they're all about 1/3 his age), but it does take its toll a bit. And I think he enjoys the slow, lazy days (for him) of the weekend here at my house where he can relax and recoup.

Dirty pool

Thu, 05 Mar 2009 19:45:08 GMT

No, I did not get a pool. No, I do not have a pool that is dirty. I do not have a pool at all. I do not need one, even if I had the space and money to install one. But that's beside the point. One of my instructors was a bit sneaky and underhanded last night. How else do you explain him hanging out in the student breakroom with his daughter and boxes upon boxes of Girl Scout Cookies? I mean, what do you think a student's reaction is going to be when his professor sees him walking down the hall and shouts out "Hi Phil!" while waiving a box of Thin Mints? Well, hypothetically speaking, of course. Since, really, the situation was Phil sitting in classroom overhearing other students mentioning Girl Scout Cookies in the lounge and a bee-line being made with cash in hand not at all knowing who the seller was. But I'm sure you get the point anyway.

Disclaimer on the off-chance that my professor or other students see this: Yes, it is meant as tongue-in-cheek with no actual irritation or annoyance or disapproval so please don't hold it against my grade.

BotM

Sun, 01 Mar 2009 20:26:26 GMT

As promised (or, rather, as I stated I would attempted) it is once again time for that wonderful monthly entry called Babe of the Month. I wasn't really sure I was going to find an entry for this month, however, since I haven't had much time to go looking. But a few days ago some friends and I headed out to see Taken. It was a fun ride, though not exactly what I'd call "high cinema". During the movie, in any scene with the daughter, I kept thinking to myself "Hmm, she looks familiar." But, I couldn't quite place her. The following day, I felt compelled to wander over to IMBD and figure out where I knew her from.

Maggie Grace . . . that name sounded a tad familiar as well. And then it leaped out of the page at me. She played Shannon on "Lost". Now, I haven't been much into Lost since part way through the second season. Ironically, not long after Shannon was killed. Though the two had nothing to do with each other. Anyway, she is, of course, an incredible looking young woman (even more so with the brunette hair, imo). But she's also an impressive actress. I was surprised how well she pulled off playing a 17 year old in the movie. And while I distinctly disliked her character on "Lost", she did a darn good job of playing her.

So, I think you'll agree what a fabulous choice she is for this entry of BotM. Enjoy!

On a completely unrelated note, it occurred to me last night that as of today it has been exactly one year since the last time I ate at the Cheesecake Factory. Yes, I tend to remember odd-ball things like that. Of course, there is a reason that I remember it specifically, but it doesn't need to be mentioned here.

Waste of time

Sat, 21 Feb 2009 05:43:56 GMT

I interviewed for a promotion today. Within an hour after interviewing, I received the dreaded HR call stating it went to someone else. Now, I knew ahead of time that I wasn't going to get it--weeks ago, really--because it has become painfully clear that I will not be allowed to leave the department I'm in. And so while I am not disappointed in not being selected, the fact that they made several people (including myself) go through the rigamarole of interviews and applications when it is painfully obvious that they knew well ahead of time who they were going to select is rather irritating. They could have at least pretended that the interviews mattered, and that it wasn't just a complete and utter waste of our time. But, I should be used to it by now . . . that's the kind of B.S. that goes on there.

Update

Sat, 14 Feb 2009 02:35:03 GMT

I realize that it's been almost 2 weeks, and I have not updated or expanded upon what happened. Hopefully, you all understand. Partially, the silence has been due to lack of desire to post on the topic. Partially, it has been due to lack of time. But now here I am. I'm not exactly sure how disjointed this post will be . . . please bear with me.

Last July, my sister decided to celebrate her 40th birthday with a rush, and went skydiving for the first time. Of course, it was a tandem jump. But it was such an exhilarating experience that she convinced myself, my brother, and a couple friends to also do it. She quickly developed a passion, and loved the freedom and joy of the sky. She chose to pursue her solo license.

On January 31, 2009, at around 2:00pm, while on her 17th jump, she encountered a problem. I'm not quite sure how else to describe it, since we do not yet know precisely the cause. There are a few theories, but nothing truly concrete. And so I will not mention them. The FAA is involved in the investigation of the incident, and hopefully their report (whenever it may come out) will shed some light on it. Here is what we do know: Her primary chute deployed and fully opened. At some point after deployment, Jen went into a spin. The cause of the spin is the unknown. Also unknown is why she did not pull her tear-away (releasing the main chute and deploying her secondary). The spin caused her to descend much more rapidly than intended, and she hit the ground at approximately 40 mph. On that same jump happened to be a few medical personnel, including a physician, so she received medical attention literally within minutes. She was airlifted to a trauma center in San Jose. Upon arrival, slightly after 3:00pm, she was conscious and responsive. Doctors put her under, and took her to surgery in order to repair damage to her shoulder area. A tear in her aorta (major artery coming off of the heart) was discovered, and despite efforts, she bled out on the operating table. She passed away at about 5:45pm.

At 7:43pm I received a call from my mom, stating that Jen had been in an accident and was in critical condition at the hospital. Due to faulty communication (another issue that I will not discuss further at this time), we were not told of the accident until 7:30pm, and were unaware at that time of the end result. When I received the call, it just so happened that I was hanging out with some friends in San Jose--about 10 minutes from the hospital. So, I was the first of my family to arrive. I have to take a moment here to mention that I am extremely blessed to have the friends in my life that I do. I have known these 3 friends since high school, but even still I was a little amazed at how quickly and instinctively they gave their support. All three (along with one's wife, who was also with us) dropped everything and came to the hospital with me. They waited until my folks & brother arrived, stayed for quite a while after we got the news, offered to get us any food/drink we needed, a place to stay in case we didn't want to drive the 60 miles back home that night, and even the jacket off their back. We could not have asked for better support if we tried.

The following Monday, I went to work. I know, that may surprise many people, that I chose to do that. But the reality is, I needed it. Having something else to focus on for a little while really helped. That day, I told very few people what had happened--my supervisor, in order to give her a heads up that I would require time off that week; and 2 friends who work there. Again, I can not express how thankful and fortunate I am for my friends. I know that people protected me that day . . . steering problems and people away from me, making sure I had my space, while at the same time protecting my privacy by not explaining why. By Tuesday, word had spread, and as more people began offering their condolences, I found that my refuge was disappearing. For that reason, and more importantly in order to be there for my family, I took the remainder of the week off.

In the week that followed, I learned many things about my sister. Things that, really, I should have known already. But one of those things I learned is just how humble she truly was. Seven years ago, she moved to California's Central Valley (about a 3.5 hour drive from here). While she had some bumps at first, we knew she had adapted and that she had become well liked by her co-workers, friends, and community. But we had no idea just how big an impact she had made. News of her passing spread throughout California. It was reported in parts of Nevada & Arizona. I found an article on-line from South Carolina. We began receiving letters, e-mails, and phone calls from people in Texas & Florida, and even as far away as Australia (she had organized a trade mission and sister-city program there). Her office received calls from the Governor's office, as well as members of not only the state congress, but from the US Congress as well. The "standard" investigation of the incident, normally handled by the safety officer at the jump facility, was taken over directly by the FAA. Her office became overwhelmed with flowers & stuffed animals from members of the community. I wish I had known more of this before . . . my level of pride in my sister is something that should have been present during her life.

My family is coping about as well as can be expected. Truthfully, it still seems a little surreal to me. It's hard conceptualizing that she is gone. It may sink in and hit me later, which is something I dread. Though I know how great my friends are, and how strong my family is, so know that I will pull through things fine. We are somewhat consoled in the knowledge that she left doing something she loved . . . she was more alive up there than ever. And she did teach me one more lesson, as communicated through my uncle in his eulogy--paraphrased: We must learn to live life in the now, and take chances. Do the things we love, and have no regrets. And while there will be no more jumping out of planes for me, I hope that I can follow through with my intent to follow that advice.

In Loving Memory

Sun, 01 Feb 2009 23:12:19 GMT

Dear Sis,

I know we've had our differences through the years--we've argued, we've disagreed, we've fought. But even through the worst of times, you have always been, and always shall be, my big sis. And while I know I never said it enough, I love you. And I will miss you.

R.I.P.
Jennifer Anne McCoun
July 4, 1968 - January 31, 2009